Dear Rascal

Dear Rascal,

Today your daddy and I had to make one of the hardest decisions that we'll ever have to make. We had to make the decision to let you leave this life and to wait for us in Heaven.

We have been dreading this day ever since you were diagnosed with Hyperthyroidism so many years ago. When you got sick so long ago, we thought that we were prepared to hear the worst news and we were so grateful when your Vet said that your Hyperthyroidism was treatable. We watched you bounce back so beautifully as we started you on your new medications. You have been such a fighter. You have moved to different houses, you were a perfect champ on our drive to Oregon and you did so well over the last year.

But then we started noticing how you weren't acting quite right. We talked to your Vets and we worked with them to make sure you were getting the medicines that you needed, but we noticed that you were growing older and losing weight and getting slower. For the past several months, I took to calling you our 'Grandma Kitty.' The way you moved and the sound of your voice reminded me of a little old lady.

This morning the alarm clock woke us up - which in itself was weird. You had the amazing ability of picking just the right time every morning (well, right time for you, anyway) to wake us up so that we would feed you your 'good' food and give you your morning medicine. This morning, that didn't happen. After you ate this morning, you came upstairs into our bedroom and right away I noticed there was something wrong. You wouldn't raise your head to look at me and you were walking as if you were dizzy and couldn't stand up straight. You still sounded the same, but your actions had me worried. You laid on my feet for a few minutes and then we called the Vet because we were so worried about you.

You cried in the car the whole way over and of course you threw up the breakfast that you had eaten earlier, you always hated being in the car.  To be fair though, you weren't the only one dreading this car ride. Your daddy and I seemed to already know what the outcome of this visit was going to be, although neither one of us could bring ourselves to say it out loud.

We left you at the Clinic so that Dr. Simmons could test your blood and your urine and your glucose levels after hugging you tightly and went to work, although neither one of us wanted to leave you or could concentrate on working today. About an hour later, Dr. Simmons called me to tell me that even though there were some things that we could do to help you feel better, those things wouldn't prolong the inevitable for long and we didn't know what kind of quality of life you would have. I called your daddy and we cried on the phone, then we both cried at work, and then we came back to the Clinic and cried some more. And then we had to say the words that we have both been dreading for years, and it was the hardest thing we have ever done.

You got to come back in the room with us so that we could hold you and snuggle with you and although were more interested in tasting the treat that we got to feed you I made you snuggle with me anyway ... we cried and we talked to you and we told you that we love you and thanked you for being such a wonderful kitty, and we told you that we were sorry that you were getting so sick ... and then it was time. I held you in my arms as you stubbornly fought the Dr. who was trying to hold your leg, and then we laid you on the table and I held you gently with one arm as daddy and I both petted you as you took your last breath. You looked so small and fragile laying there on the table and we could see how peaceful you felt and we knew that you weren't suffering any more.

You have been such a bright spot in our lives and even though you are no longer here with us, you will always be the best pet anyone will ever have.  There are very few people who might understand how you were not only a pet to us, but a very important member of our family. You were always waiting for me when I got home from work and even today as I walked through the door I looked for you. It is going to be weird to be here without you. I'll probably still talk to you - maybe you understand me a little better now that you're up in Heaven, and I'll miss snuggling with you more than you'll ever know - the couch has felt so empty this afternoon and I keep waiting for you to jump up on my lap and try to nuzzle into my neck and chest and I keep listening for your meow and your purr. Every time we hear a strange noise we wait for you to pop your head up from where it came from or to meow at us to tell us where you are.

Your daddy and I have talked a lot about you today. We have been watching the videos that we have taken of you on our phones and looking at the pictures that we have of you - your absence in our home has been and will continue to be felt more than you will ever know.

Thank you for being such a loyal little kitty. You have brought us so much joy, a little frustration (you LOVED jumping on our cupboards) and have filled our home with so much love. You are very missed and very loved and we will never forget the joy that you were in our lives.

We love you so much and we miss you so much,

Love You, Baby,
Your Mommy & Daddy

This was our first 'family picture' with you in 1998.